Me vs Me

I'm very excited about this blog because it says so much about me. It's allowing me to look back and compare who I am now to who I was. It gives me the chance to sit back and truly see the changes I've made and who I've become. This blog is more than a blog, in a way, it's my testimony now since I've grown so much.
The old me dated to avoid loneliness and didn't care who I was dating, me now dates the right person based off of what God says. The old me looked to everyone but God when I was lonely, the me now looks to God whenever loneliness begins to creep in. The old me looked to people for acceptance and approval, the me now looks to God for acceptance and approval. The old me went to people for comfort in the difficult times and the answers when I didn't have any, the me now goes to God first for answers and comfort. The old me had no confidence, no self-worth, and extremely low self-esteem because I was believing the lies of the enemy, the me now believes the truths of God and knows whose I am and that I am beautifully and wonderfully made. The old me was empty and tried to fill the void where God was supposed to be with everything else, the me now has filled that void with God and has been made complete because of it. The old me never believed in myself as being worth anything, the me now knows that I am worth more than enough. The old me was great surface level but a mess deep down, the me now has God both in my heart and on the surface.
I could go on and on with the differences between the old me and me now, but I've covered pretty much every area. The changes I've made and the life I live now make me so thankful that I finally stopped listening to everyone and everything else, and started listening to God. When you lay your life in His hands and give Him full control of everything, the changes will amaze you. God is so good and I'm so blessed to be a much better version of myself and the person God created.
"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me."
Galatians 2:20

Facing Your Past

Facing your past is something you have to do because it is something you cannot hide from. Your past is your past and at some point you will have to face it. As nice as it would be to move past, forget about it, and live as though it never happened, you cannot. It is a very difficult thing to face but it is a very good growing experience. The growth you get from facing your old self as your new self and taking responsibility for something you never took responsibility for is growth like no other. You wanna talk about something that only God can get you through, facing your past and your past mistakes is definitely one of those things. Something I've learned recently is that the saying "Your past will come back to haunt you" is one of the most true statements. It does not matter what you did, how much you've changed, or how much you wish you could take it all back - you will have to face your past and the consequences of it at some point. The best thing you can do is know who you are and who God says you are. When the moment comes and you have to face your past, make sure that you are no longer what your past is; if you are still living like your past or acting like your past, facing your past does nothing. You have to be changed and see why the change you have now was so necessary. If you are changed and you are living that out daily and doing the most you can for your relationship with God, you have learned from your past and understand why the change was necessary. Your past is your past and you can't make it disappear, but you can show that you are different. Your past is your past, but your past is no longer who you are.

"You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness."
Ephesians 4:22-24

How Are You? What’s Going On?

“How are you?” “What’s going on?” Those are both two very simple questions, but yet they hold so much meaning and can impact someone forever. Although they are very simple and easy questions to ask, we don’t ask them enough. Why is that? Maybe it’s because we don’t want to invade their personal space or we don’t know if we can handle what they may tell us. So we let them go, continue doing what they’re doing, and assume they’re okay. As someone who has been the one who was asked a form of these questions in one of my darkest moments, I needed nothing more than to be asked. Being asked that question gave me someone to open up to and someone to express what I was and had been dealing with that very few people knew about. I was depressed, stressed, confused, lost, hurting, lonely and just needed someone. Regardless of any reasons why not to ask, there are so many more important reasons why you should ask. Whether it’s because you don’t want to get involved, don’t want to invade their personal space, don’t agree with certain things they do or decisions they make, don’t want to hurt their feelings, don’t think they will respond, or anything else, they need that so much more than you realize. When no one asks it makes you feel like no one cares; there is nothing lonelier than feeling like no one cares when you are in a dark place. If I would not have been asked, who knows what would have happened or how much darker that dark place would’ve gotten. I thank the Lord all the time that that person asked because at the time, no one else was. Never fail to ask because it is so much more than a question.

Your Weakest Is Your Strongest

It may sound crazy, but those moments that make you feel so weak, that make you feel so small, are some of your strongest moments. In those "weak" moments, you have faced and dealt with so much. You are so much stronger than you realize or give yourself credit for. The strength you have to endure what you have and make it through past events, makes you stronger than 10,000 men. Never forget the strength God gave you. Never forget the strength you have used to get you through the hard times. Never forget the strength you used to get up when it seemed hardest, smile when you thought you forgot how to, talk to people when you just wanted to be alone, and keep going. The strongest people are those who tell themselves they are weak. I am currently that person right now as I type this. Life has literally been one big ball of mess recently and it has taken a toll on me, but it also shown me just how strong I am. Weakness makes you stronger because it causes you to fight when you feel like you have nothing left. Weakness is one of the greatest strengths because it pushes and motivates you. Next time you tell yourself that you're weak or those voices come back into your head, remember that you're actually strong and that you can do it. Never give up because the feeling when you finally make it and get to that finish line is the best feeling ever. You are strong, not weak!


A song that has been really helping me through my current storm is "You Say" by Lauren Daigle:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8WK9HmF53w

Galatians 6:9

As I was doing my devotion the other day, I came across Galatians 6:9 which says "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." This verse hit me hard. So often we fail to do what God wants because we are too lazy or seem to find an excuse of why we can't do it and we put it off. Two of the most simple things that I struggle with are doing my devotion daily and praying 3 times a day; I find myself saying "I'll do it later" a lot, but later never comes. I know that doing these 2 things will ultimately determine not only my attitude throughout the day, but how the day will go. On days that I have done these things, I have noticed that my day is a lot less frustrating and goes a lot smoothly; on days that I have not done these things, I seem to have a more irritated attitude and it seems like everything that could go wrong goes wrong. There is a sole purpose for why we are supposed to do the things God asks us to; these things not only make our relationship with Him flourish, but they also provide us with what we need each day to overcome daily obstacles and battles. Doing good will result in reaping what you harvest. If you don't know what reap means, Merriam-Webster says this:

1       a        (1) : to cut with a sickle, scythe, or reaping machine

                   (2) : to clear of a crop by reaping

         b        :to gather by reaping : HARVEST

2       : OBTAIN, WIN

Reaping means to obtain and win. In doing good we will reap a harvest, which means that if we do the good for God, we will receive a good harvest; the good harvest might not necessarily be what you're expecting, but the good harvest that we receive will be what will truly fulfill us. 

Do the good that God has called you to do and reap the harvest that He has planned for you! 

Seasons

We are always going through some kind of season, whether that’s a season of growth, a season of lessons, a season of difficult situations, a season of happiness, a season of flourishing, whatever the season is, we’re all going through some kind of season. Right now, I’m going through a season of growth where I’m learning how to 100% lean on God and trust in a Him. It is a very scary season because I have no idea what direction to go in, where to go next, what to do, I am the most confused I’ve ever been and at a complete standstill; the beauty of it all is I still have God. Regardless, of what has happened, He is still here. I believe God gives us seasons like this to grow us and bring us closer to Him. One of my favorite quotes is by Rick Warren and it says, “The deepest level of worship is praising God inspite of pain, trusting Him during a trial, surrenderingwhile suffering, and loving Him when He seems distant.” Throughout everything that I’m facing right now, I am not facing it alone and God has a purpose for it all. As scary of a season this is, I am so looking forward to what God is going to do in my life through this and how He is going to mold me!

The Greatest Love Story of All Time

With today being the day of love, I felt it only necessary to blog about the greatest love story of all time. How amazing it is to know that there is someone who knew you before you were even formed, put so much thought into every detail of you, going as far as each hair on your head, and sacrificed the only son He had so that you wouldn't have to sacrifice; what a love story that is. No one has anything on the love that our God has for us. He loves you at your worst moments and you at your best moments. He loves you through every failure and mistake, and through every triumph and success. He loves your vulnerable moments when you are open to Him. He loves you regardless of what anyone says about you. God does not hate a single person He created, otherwise He would have not created said person. God loves you if you're a part of the LGBTQ community, if you don't go to church, if you cuss, if you're a single mother, if you have been turned away from a church due to your lifestyle or the fact that your clothes aren't nice enough, or if you are what "Christians" look down upon; God loves the people in those categories just as much as He loves the person who leads worship, is a pastor, serves in the church, goes to church every Sunday, reads their Bible all the time, and is constantly praying. God has no gray area on His love for people; He loves all people. He didn't send His Son to die an unbearable death on a cross for people He didn't want it for; He sent His Son to die an unbearable death on a cross for you and me and everyone who has ever been on this Earth or will be on this Earth. That to me is the greatest love story to exist.

John 19 is where you can find this love story in the Bible. The link below will take you to John 19 in an online Bible:
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+19&version=NIV